Channeling Becky

I’m one of those people that think of a great response to a cutting remark 2 days later while driving in my car and obsessing about what I should have said. Then I tell myself to remember that response for the next time that exact situation arises, which it never will, but if it ever does, I will be ready with a quick, witty retort!

Ish talk.( “Ish” is my word for sh**) has always been something I wanted to get better at. Ish talking, trash talking, BS’ing, whatever you want to call it, I stink at cutting someone else down. It’s engrained in me to be nice. Molly Mormon nice. Pollyanna nice, turn the other cheek nice. I still want to be nice, but when the occasion arises for ish talking, I would like to be Becky.

Becky is my sister. I write about her often because she is a big part of my life and always has been. One thing I haven’t written about her is her expertise in trash talk and her famous “stink eye”. She is the most giving, loving, caring, nurturing and nice person I know. But when the need arises for a good tongue lashing response to a smart ass remark, Becky is Queen. She puts away her nice girl hat, and puts on her “bitch” hat. It’s a thing of beauty to watch. She transforms from June Cleaver into Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I don’t think she ever obsesses over what she should have said because she just says what she’s thinking.

Even more impressive than her searing lingual skills, is her stink eye. It’s family lore that she came out of the womb and gave the Dr. the stink eye, stopping his hand mid-air. No one was spanking her ass unless she gave them permission first. That was 54 years ago, imagine how well honed her stink eye is now. I have literally seen it stop full grown men dead in their tracks. It’s made me take a step back a time or two. It’s freaking scary.

So, I’ve been practicing. I practice trash talk with the girls I work with. I practice with my classmates and family. I have my moments when I’m on top of my trash talking game and it feels good! There’s something empowering about not always being nice, about saying exactly what you want to say. I’ve also been developing my own stink eye. I feel a little like Zoolander, looking in the mirror developing my “look”, but in a “you better back that ish up” kind of way. When I practice, I try to channel Becky and gain strength from her example. It’s empowering. It’s freeing. It’s nice to not always be nice.